I read a question recently asking why I write. Well, not so much of why I write, but why I want to write the novel that I want to. I do, I want to write a novel and I have had the story floating around in my head for a few years now and it has lived and breathed in my conscious and subconscious mind all that time.
As of yet, it remains as far from being completed as my chances of winning an Olympic Gold medal are. To put it into context, it has taken me a good couple of years to settle on the just the title.
Anyway, as part of the exercise asking why I want to write, I’m supposed to be writing down the answer, to help me get to the meat of the question. To really delve deep into why this manifestation of creativity has to come out of me. Well, to be honest I don’t have to dig all that deep because the reason why is pretty clear to me, I’ve just not thought about it all that much.
So I have been taken along down the stream of life, but at no point have I really picked up a paddle and steered.
My novel is pretty much based on my own life and my own struggles through it. It couldn’t get any more personal than that really for me. I have always been a pretty reticent, secluded person who, when I have been pulled out into the world, it has been in the slipstream of events largely created by other people. So I have been taken along down the stream of life, but at no point have I really picked up a paddle and steered.
So I know I am not alone in being this kind of person and the things I have gone through in life aren’t even spectacularly unusual. They are things which many others will have been through, but they are personal to me and they have fuelled the story I want to tell about the journey. But it’s not just that, it is about delivering a little bit of hope and positivity that hey, the Universe actually has our back no matter what.
I’m not sure if this is conceited or not, but I don’t want to be forgotten when I shuffle off this mortal coil.
I want to emote how to take better charge, to be the clichéd captain of your own ship in life’s ocean and that’s it. If I can touch one person with inspiration about how to create all of that, it will all have been worth it. I’ve never wanted to write for fame. I’ve never wanted to write so that someone can pat me on the back, but there is one other motivating factor behind the need to write my novel and that’s being remembered. I’m not sure if this is conceited or not, but I don’t want to be forgotten when I shuffle off this mortal coil.
My answer to that problem was always fairly simple for me. Go and write and novel and see it sat on the shelf of a library. That’s my enduring mark to be left on the world. One book with my name on it, sat in the library. That’s poignant to me, because I would be sitting among my peers and other hopefuls clinging on to immortality long after they have deceased.
The question that sparked all of this was from Reedsy Learning. I signed up for their mini course of “How To Start Writing a Book because for the simple fact that I haven’t gotten very far with my novel, I’ve clearly been missing something. Already, just getting in touch with the reason why I need to write this has been a tremendous help in steering myself through the choppy waters ahead. I guess after all, everything has to have a purpose.